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Is This Sentence/question Grammatically Correct? [sentence In Description]?

By antivirus software Posted in: RISING

To what extent did Napoleon’s performance in Toulon mark the beginning of his rise to power in contrast to his overthrowing of the Directory?
To me it seems a little long and kind of a mouth full. But I really want to get all those points into the question. Did I make any mistakes with “in contrast” part?
I’m trying to say how his act in Toulon befits the start of his rise to power rather than when he overthrows the directory.
Thank you~

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  1. Pretzel Says

    It’s fine but I’d say To what extent did N’s performance in T mark the beginning of his rise to power as opposed to his overthrow of the Directory
    as opposed to makes it a little clear than contrasting it to

  2. Anonymous Says

    I would add a comma after the word ‘power’ – but other than that, it’s fabulous!

  3. Grace Daniels Says

    Looks great to me!

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